Death and Dying

Tom Segura thinks about death a lot. Not in an anxious way—in a curious way. Like someone studying a problem they know they can't solve but find intellectually interesting anyway.

From "Mostly Stories," his bit on death and dying approaches the subject with the clinical deadpan that defines his style.

"Here's what I don't understand about dying: the process. Like, at some point, your body just decides it's done. Your body makes a unilateral decision without consulting you. You don't get a vote. Your body just goes, 'We're shutting down.' And you're like, 'I didn't agree to this.'"

"'He looks so natural.' No he doesn't. He looks like a wax figure of himself. Natural is when he was alive, yelling at the TV, eating chips. That was natural. This is a prop."

"We say people 'pass away.' They didn't pass away. They died. 'Passing away' sounds like they wandered off at a party."

"That's the worst part about dying. Not the dying. The people going through your stuff after."