Storytelling
56 bits
“Because the light was on.”
The Moth Joke
Norm Macdonald
Late Night with Conan O'Brien, 2009
“Then you're gay.”
Professor of Logic
Norm Macdonald
Various talk show appearances
“Death said: 'Richard... you know you done fucked up, right?'”
The Heart Attack
Richard Pryor
Richard Pryor: Live in Concert, 1979
“When you're on fire and running down the street, people get out of your way.”
The Fire
Richard Pryor
Richard Pryor: Live on the Sunset Strip, 1982
“I was in Africa, and I realized: there are no n****rs there.”
Africa
Richard Pryor
Richard Pryor: Live on the Sunset Strip, 1982
“Steven Seagal believes he's a reincarnated Buddhist lama.”
Steven Seagal Stories
Tom Segura
Ball Hog, 2020
“Looked right at the camera. At the gas station. That you go to every day.”
The First 48
Tom Segura
Completely Normal, 2014
“You ain't got no ice cream. You didn't get none.”
Ice Cream Man
Eddie Murphy
Delirious, 1983
“Aunt Bunny fell down the steps!”
Aunt Bunny Falls Down the Stairs
Eddie Murphy
Delirious, 1983
“Mr. T! What you doin'? I'm gon' whup yo' ass, Eddie!”
James Brown Celebrity Hot Tub
Eddie Murphy
Delirious, 1983
“And that's when the teacher fainted.”
Dirty Johnny
Norm Macdonald
Various appearances
“The helicopter's landing on a moving ship! In the ocean!”
Cruise Ship Helicopter
Bill Burr
Let It Go, 2010
“I've never been that lost.”
Killin' Them Softly - White People
Dave Chappelle
Killin' Them Softly, 2000
“I'm Rick James, bitch!”
Rick James
Dave Chappelle
Chappelle's Show, Season 2, 2004
“I am a professional.”
The German Guy
Norm Macdonald
Norm Macdonald Live, various talk show appearances
“I'm not good at telling stories, Conan.”
The Conan O'Brien Appearances
Norm Macdonald
Late Night / The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien, 1993-2015
“We're all at the lake. We all know what we're doing.”
Women and Fish
Patrice O'Neal
Elephant in the Room, 2011
“Baby, what are you doing out here? It's three o'clock in the morning!”
The Baby on the Corner
Dave Chappelle
Killin' Them Softly, 2000
“I'm gon' tell you somethin'—and I ain't gon' tell you but once.”
Mudbone
Richard Pryor
Richard Pryor: Live in Concert, 1979 / various specials
“Man, I ain't scared of nothing. I drink wine.”
The Wino and the Junkie
Richard Pryor
Richard Pryor: Live in Concert, 1979
“I saw things as a kid that I didn't understand until I was an adult.”
Growing Up in Peoria
Richard Pryor
Various specials, 1971-1982
“Bert drinks like someone who just got bad news.”
Bert Kreischer Is The Machine
Tom Segura
Various podcasts and live appearances
“My mother's shoe had a guidance system.”
Your Mother Threw a Shoe
Eddie Murphy
Delirious, 1983
“Half. She gets half.”
The Barbecue
Eddie Murphy
Raw, 1987
“Comedy is the only job where your commute is longer than your workday.”
Tuesdays with Stories
Mark Normand
Tuesdays with Stories podcast, 2013-present
“She asked me if the earth was round or flat and I had to think about it.”
Full Circle
Nate Bargatze
The Greatest Average American, Netflix, 2021
“My dad's a magician. Which sounds cool until you realize it means we were poor.”
The Magic Show
Nate Bargatze
The Tennessee Kid / Various specials
“The middle seat is punishment. God looked at your life and said, 'Middle seat.'”
The Airplane
Nate Bargatze
Various specials
“I got in an argument about the economy. I don't know what the economy is.”
Hello World - We're Dumb
Nate Bargatze
Hello World, Netflix, 2023
“I'm the most boring person from the most exciting state.”
The Greatest Average American
Nate Bargatze
The Greatest Average American, Netflix, 2021
“Gorilla Glue is for when you've given up on doing things correctly.”
SNL Monologue - Gorilla Glue
Nate Bargatze
Saturday Night Live, October 2023
“My dad was so old, his childhood stories were about the Depression. The actual Depression.”
My Dad Was 70
Theo Von
Various specials and This Past Weekend podcast
“People's yards had animals in them. Not pets—animals.”
Growing Up in Louisiana
Theo Von
Various specials and podcast appearances
“All my problems are stuck together. You can't solve one without pulling on all the others.”
The Rat King
Theo Von
This Past Weekend podcast / Various appearances
“We didn't have money, but we had each other. Which is what poor people say.”
Regular People
Theo Von
Regular People, Netflix, 2021
“He looked like if a cigarette was a person.”
Theo's Metaphors
Theo Von
This Past Weekend podcast / Various appearances
“Being sober is like being in a relationship with yourself that you didn't ask for.”
Addiction and Recovery
Theo Von
This Past Weekend podcast / Various specials
“My mama didn't play. She was the mama that ate the cookies and dared you to say something.”
My Mama
Lavell Crawford
Various specials and appearances
“I didn't sneak in here. There was no element of surprise.”
Being a Big Man
Lavell Crawford
Various specials and appearances
“My character has more fans than I do. Huell's winning.”
Huell Babineaux
Lavell Crawford
Various specials and interviews
“St. Louis tough is different. Nobody's bragging. They're just surviving.”
Growing Up in St. Louis
Lavell Crawford
Various specials and appearances
“I lost 120 pounds. That's a whole person. There's someone missing from this country.”
The Weight Loss
Lavell Crawford
New Look Same Funny!, Netflix, 2019
“I came from seven years of nobody watching. That's where I came from.”
Last Comic Standing
Lavell Crawford
Various specials and appearances
“We couldn't believe it. It was in the kitchen! Frosting on both sides, no syrup, no butter, no plate!”
Pop-Tarts
Jerry Seinfeld
Jerry Before Seinfeld, 2017
“The biggest bag you could find. That was your shopping cart.”
Halloween Candy
Jerry Seinfeld
Jerry Before Seinfeld, 2017
Cruel Shoes
Steve Martin
Various live performances, later published in Cruel Shoes (1979)
“When I was a kid my parents moved a lot. But I always found them.”
My Childhood
Rodney Dangerfield
Various performances
Getting Fired from SNL
Shane Gillis
Live in Austin, 2021 / Beautiful Dogs, 2023
History Guys
Shane Gillis
Beautiful Dogs, 2023
Shark Party
Anthony Jeselnik
Thoughts and Prayers, 2015
Single Lady Opening
Ali Wong
Single Lady, 2024
The Civil War
Shane Gillis
Live in Austin, 2021
Back to School
Rodney Dangerfield
Various performances, 1980s
My Parents
Nikki Glaser
Various performances
The Landlord
Hannibal Buress
Animal Furnace, 2012
Jaywalking Arrest
Hannibal Buress
Comedy Camisado, 2014 / Various performances